It was years ago that Bob was born in St. Mary’s Hospital.  His mum delivered a relatively healthy baby that she called Robert, after her father despite kicking her out when he found out that she was pregnant from a casual encounter.  Bob’s early memory was of a pain in the arm in a busy place he could not remember what it was.  His mother was grabbing his arm an early sign that he was unwanted.  He would remember many of these events becoming part of everyday life.  He remembers one day a stern looking woman came to the place he was living with his mother and take him away.  This was the last time he would ever see his mother; he was 5 or 6.  A few years afterwards his mother will die from a bad heart.  Later, he would find out it was drugs related. 

 The stern looking lady will take him to another place to live with a family.  One of many that he would be placed in.  At first, he tried to get to know the hosts but soon it became difficult to keep track.  He also lost track of how many times he moved around.  There were too many to count but the main memory was of fear going into a place he did not know to stay with people who treated him as an inconvenience.  He owned nothing but a bin bag with a few clothes and people will always comment on how scruffy he looked.  He remembers discovering some liquorice allsorts in a drawer with the kid he was sharing the room with.  He cannot forget the beating he got for eating some of them.  The host was very harsh, and they used the belt on him. 

School was hell for Bob.  As he moved from place to place the schools also changed.  The introduction to the class was almost standard.  Bob is joining us from so and so and although he lives in foster care, I hope you will be making him feel welcomed…and welcomed he was.  The bullying was relentless so was the name calling and the attacks.  On occasion he would meet an aloof man who was his “designated tutor”.  His questions were abrupt and focused only if he was behaving, if he was making any trouble, if he did as was told.  It was hardly ever about education or any of his needs.  He remembers going to see him once with a bruised eye to be asked “what did you do?”

And he did a lot!  Early on he learned that in order not to go hungry he must hide food away.  If he was to meet a new person, he had to show them that he is cannot be taken for granted, he needed to show them he can handle himself.  Sometime during his early teenage years his greeting gesture was a headbutt.  Violence was a clear vehicle for communication.  One person is down the other is up.  This became a language he became prolific in.  He could read a room quickly and in later years be able to assess the person opposite.  If he can take him or not! 

The truth that others kept talking about around him became a luxury and an unnecessary situation.  Lying about things got him to avoid punishment and any consequences to any of his actions.  The only problem was when he was get caught lying.  The consequences were dire.  So, what he needed to do was to become very good at it.  He did.  He could lie looking people straight in the eye and not even blink about it.      

Later in life he discovered this was an amazing talent to possess.  It was useful when he was stealing from shops, it was good when people asking him for the truth, it was profitable when his lies covered other people’s crimes.  Before he turned 18, he was an experienced thief and a creative liar.  His physique allowed him to take to violence should anyone was to question his “honesty”.  When he was 15, he discovered that a combination of cider and acid gives him such a buzz. To mute his brain and to relax his body even for little was so welcomed.  This habit became one of his most loyal relationships in his life.             

In prison he didn’t go until he was 22 but he went to a young offender’s institution at the age of 17 for GBH.  The “victim” was a former friend who stole some of his gear.  That really angered him; even days after the event in court he was still outraged with the theft.  He was still making threats that he will find him and kill him, in some very graphic descriptions!  The court sought no other way but to send him away.  From the age of 22 he would become a “frequent flyer” of the prison estate!  A long list of different sentences ranging from everything on offer.  Usually repeated in pattern; fine, community sentence, prison….and back again!  By the time he was 35 he had been in prison for more than 8 years collectively.  He did plenty of offender management courses and met a variety of probation and prison officers, well-meaning and not so good.  Some tried to help, and others couldn’t care but all of them fade in the background. 

Now at the ripe age of 45 he is out of the prison, and he is sofa surfing and claiming universal credit.  He gets nothing because he has unpaid fines, so he is struggling financially.  In prison he did a barista apprenticeship, but he cannot find any work.  As it stands, he is very likely to be recalled back to prison, if the cold weather doesn’t claim him first.    

In context, there are some lives that are never celebrated or commemorated.  There are people who exist but virtually no one recognises their existence.  Their lives are someone else’s inconvenience and in a society that prioritises individual achievement and progression they have none.  Bob is a fictional character.  His name and circumstances are made up but form part of a general criminological narrative that identifies criminality through the complexity of social circumstance.